In the very beginning I learned that I was “powerless.” And it is true, to this day, that I am powerless when it comes to alcohol. The awareness that I have an “obsession of the mind and an allergy of the body” is invaluable. At times, however, I have misinterpreted this powerlessness as true of all people, places and things. Imagine if every time you went in to a situation you said to yourself, I have no power here. You might as well let people and the world walk all over you, right? Very wise people have taught me that I actually have power – especially the power to choose. When I surrender to alcohol and enlist the power of someone or something greater than myself, I am empowered to live a life of freedom having escaped the oppression of alcohol. It turns out that I have confused power with control. I have at times approached Recovery as if I could figure it out and move on to my life; when it actually means that I accept I know very little and that I can control absolutely nothing. But to acknowledge the power that I have over the choices in my life has lifted me from being a victim of alcoholism to someone who is grateful that my disease has taught me, when I chose to work the Steps and integrate them into my daily living, that I can be in awe of the world and its facets instead of blaming the world for my woes by saying “it is because I am an alcoholic.” Today, I have no business questioning my disease or engaging in constant mental gymnastics over my spiritual, mental, and physical disease. But I can and want to be “baffled” and “challenged,” both personally and professionally, to be the person I was intended to be. Today this means that I have no control and very little security, but that I face the challenges and enjoy the journey that truly begins each time that I do not know which way to go. These times are no longer a burden, an excuse to be a victim again, they are an opportunity to heard the singing and to participate in the hum of the world.