In Praise of White Space
Sometimes we just need a new day a fresh start. Sometimes we need the timer reset, a “time out” like we give our children. Oh yeah, that must have been what our parents were trying to teach us. In Recovery I have learned to “pause when agitated or doubtful.” The urgency of addiction has slowly been replaced by the peace of Sobriety but only when I practice it. We talk about prayer and meditation as something we must do, I see it as something that makes my life better which gets to the quality of life I am hoping to have. It takes time, even years, to learn how to not react, to know that if I do not say something or do something immediately that it will be okay. Take it a step further; I do not remember being told that an action can sometimes be doing nothing. I remember the first time I tried to write – it was painful and awful. I felt like I was doing nothing, wasting my time in fact. Today I do not know what I would do if I could not seek out the comfort of the white space before I begin to ink up the page with words and ideas. Today I look forward to the promise of the white space as I do the promise of a new day. Today I know there will be so much to say, so many things to see. And if this does not turn out to be true I have hope that tomorrow will be different. Today I will embrace the white space and the new day with discpline and praise. Today I know that peace is white. Today I know that a blank slate awaits me and might even wonder what I will do with it. Today when I get scared of the white space I look back and see all the pages I have filled – my life is being written and painted every moment of every day and this proves my choices matter. Amen.